Episode 21: An Invitation to Know Yourself: Addiction, Awakening & Self-Love
💫 Episode 21: An Invitation to Know Yourself: Addiction, Awakening & Self-Love
If we’re being truly honest with ourselves… most of us know alcohol isn’t doing our bodies any favors. It’s a neurotoxin, and yet it’s also socially celebrated, normalized, and even romanticized. And for many people, it isn’t really about the taste or the “vibe.” It’s about escape.
In Episode 21 of Collective Guidance, I sat down with Elissa Rosenthal—writer, comedian, and sober companion who has supported celebrities and high-profile clients through addiction and mental health crises. Elissa brings a rare mix of truth, humor, and deep spiritual insight to a subject many people avoid: sobriety… and what’s underneath the desire to numb.
This conversation isn’t about judgment. It’s about honesty. And it’s about freedom.
When alcohol feels like relief
Elissa shares that she grew up feeling “off”—deeply insecure, overly self-aware, desperate for acceptance. Drugs and alcohol weren’t daily habits for her, but they became her “medicine” in a different way: a fast, reliable way to quiet her mind and soften her pain.
She describes being Jekyll and Hyde: either on a juice fast, working out, going to bed early… or out partying, doing cocaine, and disappearing into chaos. Not because she wanted to destroy her life, but because she didn’t have the emotional tools to handle it.
And one of the most powerful truths she shares is this:
The opposite of addiction isn’t sobriety. It’s connection.
For Elissa, substances created a false bridge—an artificial way to feel close to others and to life itself.
The moment everything changed
Elissa’s turning point came on May 26, 2013, after a wild Memorial Day weekend. She looked in the mirror and felt a devastating clarity: “You’re never going to be better.”
She wrote a suicide note. She drew a bath. She had Xanax and alcohol ready. And then, in what she describes as divine intervention, she opened an email from her nutrition school quoting Deepak Chopra:
“Do you want to be a prisoner of your past or a pioneer of your future?”
Something in her woke up. A moment of clarity. A spiritual interruption. And she chose life—one decision, one day at a time.
Early sobriety: the hardest part isn’t the cravings
When I asked what the early days were like, Elissa didn’t romanticize it.
She said the hardest part wasn’t just putting down substances—it was being left with her thoughts.
Darkness. Victimhood. Hopelessness. Emotional instability. The feeling that one small problem could spiral into catastrophe.
But this is where she shared something deeply healing: the power of hearing “me too.”
In recovery spaces, she realized she wasn’t uniquely broken. She wasn’t terminally “different.” She was human—and she wasn’t alone.
That support system helped her build a new way of living: one moment at a time.
The deeper work: abstinence is not recovery
One of the most important themes of this episode is that sobriety isn’t just quitting a substance.
Elissa says it clearly:
Abstinence is not recovery.
Putting down alcohol is the first step—but what follows is the real work: meeting the shame, the trauma, the self-hatred, the patterns… and learning how to live as your own safe place.
She shares how her healing came in layers:
AA and the Steps as an invitation to rewire the brain and take accountability with compassion
The Hoffman Process to uncover inherited patterns from her parents
A major health crisis (mold toxicity + Lyme disease) that forced her to witness how thoughts and emotions impact the body
A deepening spiritual devotion through meditation, Dr. Joe Dispenza work, and nervous system regulation practices
Boundaries, worthiness, and relationships that evolve
Sobriety didn’t just change Elissa’s habits. It changed how she related to people.
She describes how she used to be a classic people-pleaser—lighting herself on fire to keep others warm. Paying for people. Chasing approval. Crumbling if someone was upset with her.
Now, after years of growth, she has clearer standards:
she doesn’t chase relationships
she values energetic reciprocity
she chooses “a f*ck yes” over uncertainty
she honors that sometimes “rejection is protection”
She also speaks candidly about navigating family dynamics, including the courage it takes to step back from relationships that consistently cause harm—without needing to villainize anyone to protect your peace.
What she does instead of drinking
This part of the episode was so grounding because Elissa is real: she doesn’t pretend she’s above coping mechanisms. She’ll still dissociate sometimes—scrolling, binge watching, shopping—because we’re human.
But when she chooses tools, she goes inward:
calming magnesium baths
breath + nervous system regulation
listening to frequencies
prayer/meditation (including Ho’oponopono: I’m sorry. Please forgive me. Thank you. I love you.)
returning to the truth: “I am the source. I am the creator.”
And she also emphasizes something that matters: sobriety is still one day at a time.
Not forever promises. Not spiritual perfection. Just today.
Sobriety doesn’t erase joy—it amplifies it
A lot of people fear sobriety will make life dull. Elissa says the opposite happened.
She laughs more now. She’s more present. She has more access to play.
And she brings joy to others through her work teaching improv in private rehabs, giving people something many of them haven’t had in a long time: a reprieve from the mind.
Her intention is simple and beautiful:
“Five seconds of being fully present and laughing.”
And that, in itself, is healing.
For the sober-curious: an invitation, not a life sentence
Elissa offers such a compassionate message for anyone questioning their relationship with alcohol:
This isn’t about declaring “I’ll never drink again.”
This is about asking:
Who are you… and who do you want to be?
If drinking helps you connect, stay aligned, and feel good the next day—she’s not here to shame you.
But if alcohol creates chaos… shame… obsessiveness… regret… disconnection… then sobriety might be an invitation to meet yourself more deeply.
Because at the end of the day, you’re the one who lays your head on the pillow inside your own consciousness.
And sobriety can be a doorway into becoming someone you actually like living with.
✨ If this message resonates with you, please share this post with a friend, subscribe to the Collective Guidance podcast, and join me on Instagram @charligirl7 or @collectiveguidance . Let’s create a world where sensitivity is celebrated.
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Sending love, remembrance, faith, and creativity,
Charla ❤️
